Yesterday, during my usual work in the consulting room, I had an exciting encounter with one of my many wonderful clients.
My patient, a 3-year-old girl, walked into my consulting room with her mother. She sat in the chair to my right, where a patient is rightfully supposed to sit in the consulting room.
The mother sat on another chair behind her. I greeted her and asked how she was. Uncharacteristic of her, she was quiet, moody, and did not make eye contact.
I used all my skills to draw her into the conversation. I have a lot under my sleeve as a paediatrician, humbly, of many years of experience, but she would not engage. Our usual vibe was not there this time. I grew worried because it meant our interaction might not go the way I had hoped.
I then asked the mother why they had come to see me. She told me my client had been running a high-grade fever for about 2 days, was coughing, and had a runny nose.
The usual stuff at this age, and a child in a preschool, right? I then went ahead to examine (checked) her. Surprisingly, she was cooperative. After we were done with the examination, she went to the small playing ground in my consulting room to play with what I always tell them, “My toys”, so no one tries to take them away when it is time for them to leave the consulting room.
It is one of the rules to prevent any of them from claiming ownership of the available playing and learning items. It is always good for children to play so they can explore and be creative.
However, they should know their limits.
I then asked the mother why she, my client, was behaving that way, she of all people. Was she afraid of anything? Was she apprehensive about a possible injection or shot? Something I would have found it strange, as “we do not inject children in our consulting rooms.”
Parents, take note. Please do not use that to get your ward to behave well, at least not when you are in the doctor’s office. The mother said my little friend was annoyed because she did not want to go to the hospital. Her reason was that she wanted to go to school and watch “Messi and Ronaldo”.
You could imagine the confusion on my face. I asked the mother, “Did you say Messi and Ronaldo”? She responded in the affirmative. I was even more confused. I then enquired whether they had a television in their classroom and whether they usually showed football.
The mother said, “No”. She said their school usually organises football games between students in the primary and upper classes, and they call the teams “Messi and Ronaldo.” Apparently, it was their last day at school before the Christmas break, “Our Day,” so the football match had been heavily promoted. Her daughter is always happy when there is an event like that at the school.
“She is always excited, she doesn’t joke with that, said the mother. I asked her if my little friend watches football with her father. She said, “Not really.”
I then asked my client which team was her favourite, and she said…RONALDO!!
Children and playing
Children will always gravitate towards physical activity. They like exploring and finding solutions to things of their age. They are creative. They value fun, and even after a negative experience, they will return eventually. They learn to get up when they fall.
They don’t really like your phone, tablet or laptop that much. These things restrict their imagination and creativity. Let them play in a safe, secure, and age-appropriate environment.
On several occasions, children walk into the consulting room holding a smart device to watch cartoons, but as soon as they see the small playground in the corner, they drop the device and play instinctively.
Young children and celebrities
Children’s ability to imitate others’ actions is a powerful form of learning, as it prompts parental interaction and helps them understand their social world. The first role model for any child is their parents. The next role model for any young child is their teacher.
Teachers are never wrong in the eyes of a toddler or a preschooler. Dare to correct what Auntie or Miss “B” said, and they will tell you, “That is not what their teacher said or taught them.” In today’s media-focused world, however, children would rather look up to or even become obsessed with celebrities rather than their parents.
TV series and social media have created a celebrity-driven environment in which children begin to emulate famous athletes and music stars from an early age. Children are drawn to series and commercials that portray lives that seem much more colourful and interesting than their own.
However, some of these personalities have negative influences. Some celebrities may behave poorly in public. They may be involved in one scandal or another, and they may dress inappropriately for functions, especially at red-carpet events. Children may view these as ideal worlds, unbeknownst to them, and thus seek to emulate them.
On the other hand, celebrities can be a tremendous positive influence on young children. Many celebrities use their public profile to support charities, raise awareness of diseases, or make donations. Many sports figures offer insight into their arduous journeys and share the personal sacrifices they made to achieve success. These are values worth emulating for young children who see these famous personalities as their idols. It is not wrong for a young child to have a celebrity as an idol.
When talking to children about their favourite celebrities, conversations can be steered towards understanding why they like a particular celebrity much more than another. In this way, parents can gain insight into their children’s values.
These conversations are also an opportunity to introduce children to more compelling role models who exhibit admirable attributes. In the case of my little friend’s favourite footballer, Ronaldo (C7), he is a perfect example of these good values, in my humble opinion.
The writer is a consultant paediatrician at The Bank Hospital, Cantonments, Accra
By: Dr Kojo Ahor-Essel, a consultant paediatrician at The Bank Hospital, Cantonments, Accra
